Giving hard feedback
We’ve all been there.
You finally carve out time to review a draft and realise it's not quite landing. It's not terrible, but it's not right either.
And now you're weighing up how much to say, how to say it, and whether you'll just end up fixing it yourself.
Here are three ways to stay out of that last trap and keep your team relationship intact.
1. Minimise the need for it. As you know, I’m a big fan of asking for a one-page outline first, not the whole doc. Download my templates here. It's faster to redirect two paragraphs than 30 slides. An outline lets you spot the structural problem before your team member has invested three days in polished prose. You intervene earlier, they learn faster, and nobody's ego is on the line.
2. Agree a framework for evaluating the messaging up front. Vague feedback (“this isn't quite right”) creates friction. A shared framework removes the guesswork. My SCORE framework helps. Ask yourself if the draft …
- Sets the scene quickly by drawing the audience toward one insightful message
- Conveys the right balance of strategic and operational detail
- Organises the ideas in a well-structured hierarchy
- Readies the audience for a productive discussion
- Engages the audience using a medium, style and tone that suits them
3. Bridge with empathy. Before diving straight into the problems or perhaps opening comments or adding stickies, have a brief conversation.
Here are some ideas to open the conversation before delivering some direct comments about the substance of the messaging:
- “I was thinking differently about what we needed to achieve here. I had X in mind.”
- “I see where you're coming from. The missing piece that changes the picture is Y.”
- “I used to frame it that way too. Here's what shifted my thinking.”
The instinct is to mark up the document. The better move is to explain why your changes matter so you build your team’s capability.
More soon,
Davina
Whenever you're ready, here are five other ways I can help you:
Elevate, the book – helps leaders set their teams up to set up a new dynamic across their team that will elevate everyone’s skills, helping the team get better, faster decisions.
Engage, the book – helps individual contributors prepare papers and presentations that leaders can approve without reworking.
Engage, the self-paced course – supports both individuals and leaders prepare more insightful papers and presentations for senior leaders and boards.
Extreme Clarity, the 2-hour workshop – introduces techniques for structuring your messaging.
Board Paper Bootcamp, the 2-week program – helps you clarify and convey complex ideas to senior leaders and boards.
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ABOUT AUTHOR: DAVINA STANLEY
I love what I do.
I help senior leaders and their teams prepare high-quality papers and presentations in a fraction of the time.
This involves 'nailing' the message that will quickly engage decision makers in the required outcome.
I leverage 25+ years' experience including
- learning structured thinking techniques at McKinsey in Hong Kong in the mid 1990s before coaching and training their teams globally as a freelancer for a further 15 years
- being approved to teach the Pyramid Principle by Barbara Minto in 2009
- helping CEOs, C-suite leaders and their reports deeply understand their stakeholder needs and communicate accordingly
- seeing leaders cut the number of times they review major papers by ~30% and teams cut the amount of time they take to prepare major papers by ~20%*
- watching senior meetings focus on substantive discussions and better decisions rather than trying to clarify the issue
My approach helps anyone who needs to engage senior leaders and Boards.
Recent clients include 7Eleven, KPMG, Mercer, Meta, Woolworths.
Learn more at www.clarityfirstprogram.com
(*) Numbers are based on 2023 client benchmarking results.
















